Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude

Filthie's Mobile Fortress Of Solitude
Where Great Intelligence Goes To Be Insulted

Tuesday, 3 April 2018

Filthie's Fingers




Correctly guess what substance is smeared on Filthie's fingers
and win a trip for two to Toefield, Alberta!


Rod is a creepy looking sort that runs a squalid gun smithy on the North Side. I swear, I could go in there with a top of the line Rigby or an original vintage Holland & Holland - and he would talk trash about it and tell everyone what a piece of junk I had. And if Jack was next in line with a Cooey single shot beater - Rod'd treat him like royalty. Rotten Rod is an a-hole which makes us borderline friends, if that makes any sense.

Rod had gotten his hands covered in something perfectly innocent as I did, and I took the opportunity to make sport of his hygienic and personal grooming habits - which are politely referred to as 'second rate' at the best of times. When he got fed up with my BS, he grabbed my hand and shook it and proclaimed - 'The best piece of ass I ever got was when my fingers poked through the toilet paper...!'

HAR HAR HAR!!! Even I had to laugh at that! 

But when I got outside and the coast was clear, I cleaned my hands in a snow bank and wiped them off on a gun rag I had in the truck - and then threw that away too.

2 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. It's actually leather dye, Robert... which is probably made out of some kind of nitric salt or other, no doubt..

      Delete