I kinda sorta expected it and probly deserved it.
The other day I drank way too much coffee and my bladder was about to explode. With my back teeth swimming - I brought my truck hard over and raced down into one of Aaaaadmintin's river valley public parks. It's fall up here in Alberta, and the trees are turning and everyone is out with the kids or by themselves for a stroll in the spectacular leaves while they can. They'll be gone on the next windy day.
But I was now sweating and losing structural containMINT!
I pulled into a swimming pool parking lot and hoofed it inside on the double; I only had seconds to spare! I made it to the men's - and did my business and averted what would have surely been a personal tragedy. Sighing with relief I zipped up, washed my hands - and headed back out to get on with my day.
On the way out I noticed the people in the foyer - I literally didn't spare them a second glance on my way in, preoccupied as I was with my own problems. But all the swimmers were mentally handicapped adults. We aren't talking about the special kids here at Uncle Bob's - we are talking honest-to-God mentally retarded adults. And sprawled across the floor, almost so that I almost tripped over her - was a woman with no pants on.
For a horrible split second I was utterly gobsmacked. She just sprawled across the floor, mumbling to herself and lost in the world. She had obviously slipped her keepers. Why would God do that to someone, I wonder? I looked around and they were ALL like that - just folks that intellect had left behind. I question my faith and myself sometimes. One day I was on the internet and taken to task by an angry bedwetter for making rude jokes about retards and short buses; she called them 'emissaries from heaven'. Being a pig, all that did was set me and my fellow swine up for more rude jokes. That angry young woman woulda shot the lot of us for a dime after that discussion, I'd expect. We probably would have deserved it too.
Keeping a close eye on the lady, I backed around a corner and called her guardians over. I stayed until they had her up and ... composed ... again - and then just plunked my arse down on a bench and tried to get my head round it. Didn't get anywhere with that, of course. Sometimes stuff just hits ya out of the blue, yannow? And then it stays with ya for awhile and you can't shake it. Are these people sent by God to test us? Or by Darwin and Murphy to humble us? Or taunt us?
When I saw Wirecutter's Wiener Wagger I wondered if this wasn't the male equivalent to that young lady. Can you imagine having the regular sex drives of a healthy young man - and a vacuous intellect like that to deal with it? Surely it would have to be hell on earth. Something about that vid just hit me wrong.
NC Mike told me where to go and how to get there and maybe he's right - and maybe I should just STFU.